Loneliness in a Hyper-Connected Society

September 07, 2020 by Alannah Paren in Inspiration

Back in March of 2019, I jotted down in my notes: “What are the pros and cons of being so connected through technology in this day and age?” Now, over a year later, I find this question almost even more relevant and worth considering. It is incredibly fascinating that through today’s technology we can contact anyone in the world at any given minute and conduct work or school from the comfort of our own homes, among many other things. While I recognize the extreme benefits, there are moments when I feel that our machines and devices are tipping the scales of connectivity, entering into a realm where we are actually more isolated as individuals.

The ability to gather international news and access an incomprehensible amount of resources from the palms of our hands, are just two of the ways that technology has forever shaped society. And it is definitely a balance, because without these means to connect, we’d lack even more empathy in the world, as it would be incredibly hard to maintain awareness for others outside of our social bubbles. Yet, there is a special energy that requires us to get breaths of fresh air and open ourselves up to factors of life that span beyond standard screen sizes. I definitely took for granted the ease of being able to get out and meander in spaces, an activity that exposes us to strangers and allows for the magic and beauty of unexpected conversations. These days, it’s easy to virtually transport oneself across the globe or even complete daily errands like grocery shopping, without even leaving the couch.

With such hyper-connectivity, it is easy to slip into the territory of loneliness and isolation – sometimes without even realizing that it is happening. In my own experience, even if I am able to manage keeping up friendships and enhancing my worldly knowledge from behind the screen, I tend to lose my internal sense of being grounded. Physically enjoying nature, being in people’s presence, and getting to separate work life from my personal space, are all things that encourage my overall wellbeing. After long extents of relying on digital means to satisfy my human need to connect and engage, I find that I then tend to log off with an extreme sense of personal discontent. Moments that I get to spend with the people I love and the small adventures like walking to get takeout are the mini wins that I have learned are key to my own personal sanity.

In an effort to stay hopeful and honor ourselves through the actions that make us happiest, it is so important that we make space for the people and activities that keep us tuned into our best selves. While we oddly are feeling the restrictions of being physically bound within our homes, the lines delineating our personal, professional, and social lives have become completely blurred. It is okay to not have everything figured out, or to feel completely lost in a society that is outlining exactly where we should or shouldn’t be this year.

I have a lot to thank technology for and without the innovations of today’s world, I would be feeling an incredible void. The opportunities I have had, the people I cherish most, even this blog, are all aspects of my life that have benefitted from the ability to transcend time and distance through devices. However, the seed of our souls were not planted to thrive with machinery alone. It takes a healthy dose of other elements to keep us balanced as humans. This equilibrium can be achieved when we are intentional with our utilization of modern technology. Predetermining our goals when we unlock our phones or log on to our computers can be incredibly beneficial; whether we are heading into a work Zoom, hoping to connect with someone, or dedicating recreational perusing of social media, making mindful decisions can keep us in charge of our time and happiness.

Stay hopeful everyone and continue finding safe ways to spark joy! xoxo

Channeling Fearlessness

November 26, 2017 by Alannah Paren in Inspiration

Hello! For the longest time I have kept this blog privatized, being too insecure to allow my thoughts and feelings to be so exposed to those around me, but I have finally come to the point in life where I want to give my creative project the space and recognition I always envisioned it would have. As I continue to grow as an individual and solidify my purpose on this planet, my one steady goal in mind has been to leave a positive footprint in this world through my words. My ultimate dream is to dedicate my life to soaking up as many culturally diverse experiences as possible and then writing about them so that they are accessible to as many people as possible, in an effort to hopefully bridge the gaps between populations and blur the divisions among all of us. By the end of my lifetime, I hope that this world is more cohesive, empathetic, and receptive than when I entered it. So in correlation with what I am doing by releasing this blog, I have chosen to make this post all about being fearless and being your own biggest supporter.

My entire life I have dealt with insecurities and the fears that come along with the lack of confidence. Throughout my life, there always seemed to be questions looming in the back of my mind of whether or not people around me genuinely liked me, and essentially I just rarely trusted that I was being positively perceived. Until college, I naturally never felt as though I truly fit in with people in my same age range and I could never seem to find that place in the world where I was truly accepted. I feel like that has played a large role in my anxieties with food, since it was one of the only things I could control and I could at least make sure that I “looked” good even if I doubted people liked what was beneath the surface. Recently, I started to feel old insecurities slowly try to creep back in, but then I remembered that I have the power, just like everyone else, to choose to be fearless and pave my own path.

I think what I am trying to say, is that as individuals, we have every right to love and support ourselves. Why can’t we act in ways that make us happy and say things we think are funny without feeling ashamed? Lately, the closer to my heart that I have lived my life, the more I have attracted people who genuinely care and want to be around me. Not only that, but my confidence has remained steady and therefore it is easier to ignore people who aren’t as openly accepting. Being confident in yourself is something that has the potential to transcend to a level of visibility, taking the form of a noticeable glow that almost acts as a protective bubble that only magnetizes positivity as you go through the ins and outs of daily life. It becomes easier to find happiness in even the smallest parts of life when you find contentment with yourself. When you have established that you have in yourself someone who will always love you, will always laugh at what you think is funny, and will always believe in your abilities and dreams, life becomes so much more manageable and carefree.

Essentially, life is not a competition and we have to choose to live our lives for ourselves. I know the topics that I write about won’t be accepted by all that read them, and I know that half the time people probably won’t even take the time out of their days to read my posts. But I have come to the conclusion that that’s okay, and I can’t be afraid of all the things that might go wrong, because what about all the things that might go right? If I impact just one person by being so vulnerable, I’ll be content knowing that I am one step closer to achieving my ultimate dream. I hope that everyone can look at themselves and see that they have nothing to fear in living life in whichever way makes them happiest, because at the end of the day, the scariest thought is to never have truly lived at all, or to have never at least given yourself the chance of being happy. The next time you question even the smallest of things, like whether or not you should smile at that person from across the coffee shop, challenge yourself to shed any doubts and actually follow through with your intentions. The worst that can happen is that you acknowledged the light and power within yourself, and the truth is, is that even though we might fall down a few times along the way, once we have discovered our own fearlessness, that’s when we will all be living our individual lives as close to our heart’s desire as possible.

Thanks for reading! I know I haven’t been as consistent with posting in the past, but I’m planning to put the energy into making this a big focus in my life from here on out!

Honoring Yourself

January 11, 2016 by Alannah Paren in Inspiration

As this new year begins many of us are setting New Year’s resolutions. We reflect on the previous year and ask ourselves what goals will bring us even more joy or bring us closer to the life we dream. Someone very close to me often reminds me that life is a continual journey of improvement, and that no matter where we start, every day can be even better than the last. This past year brought a lot of positive changes, and I learned a very important rule: everyone needs to take time for themselves and honor themselves in some way.

I recently went to a healing session, and the main message that was directed toward me was that I need to take more time for myself. Of course continually adventuring during my free time is fun, but sometimes it is good to take a step back from everything. Personally, I need to allow myself the space and time to organize my thoughts, reenergize, and get more in tune with my body. In doing so, I know that I will not only appreciate life even more, but the people around me will be pleased to be around a happier version of myself.

Honoring yourself can be anything that means something to you. Whether it be starting a new ritual or breaking a bad habit, or setting a reward for yourself once you accomplish something you’ve always wanted to do. It could be setting aside fifteen minutes everyday to read or write, sticking to your workout plan, or even researching a passion you’d like to pick up. Incorporated into my New Year’s resolution is to eat even healthier, for the sole purpose of feeling better inside and out. Recently I have battled with dieting and exercising as I felt that everyone around me loved me more when I was health-conscious, since taking care of myself results in looking better too. However, I found that I should want to be as healthy as I can for me, so that I can be happy, and not necessarily to gain acceptance from others. The key to common happiness starts with individuals loving themselves and finding contentment, and then spreading their happiness onto those around them.

Give yourself the gift of healing through the people, places, and activities that you cherish. We all deserve to breathe and attend to the needs of our bodies and minds. Feel free to share what you do to honor yourself! Here’s to a new year of being a happier, healthier you, in a happier, healthier universe!