Loneliness in a Hyper-Connected Society

Back in March of 2019, I jotted down in my notes: “What are the pros and cons of being so connected through technology in this day and age?” Now, over a year later, I find this question almost even more relevant and worth considering. It is incredibly fascinating that through today’s technology we can contact anyone in the world at any given minute and conduct work or school from the comfort of our own homes, among many other things. While I recognize the extreme benefits, there are moments when I feel that our machines and devices are tipping the scales of connectivity, entering into a realm where we are actually more isolated as individuals.

The ability to gather international news and access an incomprehensible amount of resources from the palms of our hands, are just two of the ways that technology has forever shaped society. And it is definitely a balance, because without these means to connect, we’d lack even more empathy in the world, as it would be incredibly hard to maintain awareness for others outside of our social bubbles. Yet, there is a special energy that requires us to get breaths of fresh air and open ourselves up to factors of life that span beyond standard screen sizes. I definitely took for granted the ease of being able to get out and meander in spaces, an activity that exposes us to strangers and allows for the magic and beauty of unexpected conversations. These days, it’s easy to virtually transport oneself across the globe or even complete daily errands like grocery shopping, without even leaving the couch.

Bondi Beach, Australia // July 2019

Bondi Beach, Australia // July 2019

With such hyper-connectivity, it is easy to slip into the territory of loneliness and isolation – sometimes without even realizing that it is happening. In my own experience, even if I am able to manage keeping up friendships and enhancing my worldly knowledge from behind the screen, I tend to lose my internal sense of being grounded. Physically enjoying nature, being in people’s presence, and getting to separate work life from my personal space, are all things that encourage my overall wellbeing. After long extents of relying on digital means to satisfy my human need to connect and engage, I find that I then tend to log off with an extreme sense of personal discontent. Moments that I get to spend with the people I love and the small adventures like walking to get takeout are the mini wins that I have learned are key to my own personal sanity.

In an effort to stay hopeful and honor ourselves through the actions that make us happiest, it is so important that we make space for the people and activities that keep us tuned into our best selves. While we oddly are feeling the restrictions of being physically bound within our homes, the lines delineating our personal, professional, and social lives have become completely blurred. It is okay to not have everything figured out, or to feel completely lost in a society that is outlining exactly where we should or shouldn’t be this year. 

Blue Mountains, Australia // July 2019

Blue Mountains, Australia // July 2019

I have a lot to thank technology for and without the innovations of today’s world, I would be feeling an incredible void. The opportunities I have had, the people I cherish most, even this blog, are all aspects of my life that have benefitted from the ability to transcend time and distance through devices. However, the seed of our souls were not planted to thrive with machinery alone. It takes a healthy dose of other elements to keep us balanced as humans. This equilibrium can be achieved when we are intentional with our utilization of modern technology. Predetermining our goals when we unlock our phones or log on to our computers can be incredibly beneficial; whether we are heading into a work Zoom, hoping to connect with someone, or dedicating recreational perusing of social media, making mindful decisions can keep us in charge of our time and happiness.

Stay hopeful everyone and continue finding safe ways to spark joy! xoxo 

Compounding Change

Amidst these unique times, change has become obvious. We see differences in the way we navigate everyday activities, and modes of adaptation are at the top of the agenda as we discuss what our post-pandemic future may look like. As we continue to learn how to cope with the ever-evolving situation that our world is battling, we are also still experiencing the inevitable trials of human life that have always existed. Personally, I find myself dealing with immense feelings of change as I graduate college and attempt to transition into a new phase of life during this universal uncertainty.  

I am grappling with the reality that this current position is not what I had visualized for myself when I dreamt of becoming an official Berkeley graduate. The long-term planner in me had assumed that logically my first step in the real world would be to place my foot in the door of a stable career. After spending months preparing for dream opportunities, my prospects dissolved given the economic circumstances. However, in addition to a degree, my college years also bestowed me with valuable lessons that I believe will carry me farther than any formal education could. Once I got accepted into Berkeley, I thought I crossed off a big item from my life agenda; but, come freshman year I realized that there were holes in my fairly linear plan. I hadn’t thoroughly considered how my time at Berkeley would impact my identity beyond the classroom. Being a student was so engrained within me, and I soon found that there were points in my college career where my bigger objectives were to manage my relationships and maintain my health. Now - as I sit here writing this from the vantage point of straying from what I felt was a secure, original blueprint - I recognize that this period ahead is asking me to apply my larger ambitions and lessons to manifest abundance in all aspects of my life. Juggling the multitude of emotions and experiences over these last few years has essentially been like training my brain to stay balanced on a surfboard in an effort to ride out the waves of life with as much strength and confidence as possible. 

Berkeley, CA // March 2019

Berkeley, CA // March 2019

Balance cannot be achieved without training one’s focus. And, while the chaotic global climate has not been overwhelmingly positive, I will say that it has given me the gift of perspective. Last week, I took a solemn walk on campus as a goodbye gesture to the place I have considered home for the last four years. I noticed so many more details than my buzzy, rushed walks to classes ever allowed me to observe. My separation due to quarantine granted me with the ability to relish in the minutiae that I would not otherwise have missed until it was too late to soak them in one last time. A moment of epiphany occurred when I recognized that expecting this change was a blessing, and without the natural ebbs and flows of life I wouldn’t be able to enter this phase with the same brilliant force and appreciation behind me. I feel like my life up until this point has been the gradual baking and stacking of a cake; and, with my tiered foundation now in place, I am ready to continue the process towards my ultimate masterpiece, decorating myself and adding color along the way.

I suppose that in sum, we can never truly predict the dose of change that life will heap onto us; however, what we can do is choose the way we respond. In any situation it is important to stay open-minded to the lessons we may learn about ourselves, as well as foster gratitude. When we take the time to dive within and assess what we can and cannot control, we exercise our capability to remain stable during rocky times. Change has transformed our pasts into our present selves, and change is what is currently building us into better versions to embrace the future. Being thankful for growth relieves the blocks we subconsciously place on ourselves. It is by no means easy, but when we reach a point of self-trust we lose the tension and apprehension that comes with facing changes. 

Berkeley, CA // May 2019

Berkeley, CA // May 2019

These are scary times for many, and as we continue to face the natural ripples that affect us, we are also all weathering out this global tsunami. I encourage you all to notice your own strength and capabilities – your entire life up until this point has been one extensive course on how to stay afloat, and if you continue to hone in on maintaining your equilibrium, you will not have to fear even the biggest of breakers. While life can seem stagnate at times, other stages offer more action and require more adaptation. Let us not fail to remember that we have all survived changes before, and we have the power to conquer what may lie ahead. xoxo

Yesterday I was clever, so I wanted to change the world. Today I am wise, so I am changing myself.
— Rumi