grateful soul

Happy February! In light of Valentine’s Day coming up, I wanted to do another special feature on “love.” Last year I wrote about a few things I had learned on the topic, but this year I want to write about something that I am still working on fully integrating into my own life - the idea that no matter how upsetting a situation is, you approach it with love. When we feel like we are dealing with someone on a different vibration than we are, or when we feel hurt by another person’s thoughts or actions, it is easy to turn to being unhappy, disappointed, and maybe even angry. However, these feelings are not productive in terms of mending and healing, which is why we must ask ourselves an important question: “How can I love in this situation?”

The world can be, and currently is, a very messy place, and in an effort to move forward in a more holistically positive direction, we need to begin to do as much as we can to guide our lives with love and empathy. Stepping back from situations and evaluating how you fit into whatever might be unfolding, is crucial in not only helping to protect your own heart and soul energy, but also in understanding how to handle such circumstances. Let’s say you are having a hard time seeing eye-to-eye with a friend, coworker, roommate, or family member. It’s easy to get riled up, to begin to plaster up the walls of your heart and mind, and to keep those thick layers of defense on for all future interactions. But what if, before you began to apply these shielding mechanisms, you actually expanded these channels? What if you took a look at the situation and realized, “Okay, this is how _____ feels, because of xyz…,” and you allowed yourself to simply bring some love and empathy into the situation? Now, not only have you saved yourself the burden of wasting energy on fortifying your shields, but you have also taken a third person perspective on the scene at hand, giving you the ability to see how the other person is approaching the situation and how you thus should respond.

This is not an easy task. And by no means does this mean that you have to agree with the person or feel unconditional love. All this practice is serving to do is to get us to in some capacity leak love into our every action, and the more love we exude, the more we will attract. For instance, despite having an emotional morning and having a lot weighing on my heart the other day, I decided to take a moment to myself in the car. I realized that my next agenda item – my weekly grocery shopping at Whole Foods – had no relation to the outside upsets I was dealing with, so I sat in my car and said to myself, “Alright universe, I am going to do my best to shed my fears, anger, and doubts, and just trust, manifest, and magnetize.” As soon as I stepped out of my car and went to grab a cart (with a very mustered, but nonetheless bold, smile on my face) I could feel love radiating. The carts seemed to be stuck together, and I was mid-struggle when a man came over and helped me out and reassured me that it wasn’t just me having difficulties. Once inside the store, I felt like everyone I passed was smiling in my direction, so I kept beaming back, to the point that eventually, my phony smile was really genuine. The feeling was surreal – all I had to do was decide to enter into the setting with love, and low and behold, there was love to be acknowledged and received. This just goes to show that the question of “How can I love in this situation?” is not just applicable in dealing with other individuals, but sometimes we need it for ourselves or for approaching general, public scenes as well.

At the end of the day, we just need to do our best at considering what we are carrying with us and how we can work on overcoming difficulties, as opposed to shutting ourselves off from solutions. Analyzing how we can be better individuals by better understanding those around us is essential to a more unified society that operates more effortlessly. Next time you find yourself welling up with frustration or scorn, try to evaluate how you and the other person may be living on different frequencies and how, even if it isn’t a familial or romantic love, you do have flickers of love to disperse to all souls. Allow love to flow through you, so that you may magnetize more into your life and also guard yourself from the repercussions that come from stopping up your love channels with frustration, upset, and other negativities. Feel free to reach out if you have suggestions, want to discuss something, or just need a listening ear! Have an amazing month of love!

Happy February! In honor of it being the month of love, I thought it would be appropriate to discuss a few of the insights I’ve gained in the relatively short twenty years that I have been a part of this world. I feel like naturally February is associated with the romantic love that comes with being in a relationship, but there are so many other forms of love that deserve recognition too! Today’s culture has cultivated this trend of looking forward to Valentine’s Day if you are in a steady partnership, while the rest of the world holds feelings of bitterness and makes self-deprecating jokes about loneliness, but I am here to encourage us all to embrace love generally no matter the time of year.

1. Loved Ones Deserve Love – Since coming to college, I have realized that loved ones, like family members, often serve as our emotional bounce board since we take their love for granted. They are often the ones we feel so safe with, that we dump all of our negativity, rants, stress, etc. on them. Usually, it isn’t under after we’ve cooled down and recovered from whatever situation we were dealing with, that we realize the majority of our time talking to our beloved was spent hashing out everything but what should have been the focus of the conversation. Moral of the story here: although it is healthy to express your emotions in a safe space, remember to reach out to loved ones during times when its not just because you need a shoulder to lean and cry on. Express your appreciation and love for those that are close to you, and challenge yourself to reach out to people just to see how their days are or discuss something that is making life great at the moment!

2. Love Can Heal The Wounds It Causes – Referring back to the various levels of love, sometimes we find ourselves in a position where the love we had for someone is forced to retreat into the cavities of our hearts as we are no longer able to love that person in the capacity that we previously did. These instances can often make their mark by leaving a substantial scar on our hearts, which then arouses many questions, feelings of doubt and paranoia, and potentially, deep pain and sadness. However, unlike salt, if we add love from other areas of life to the wound that love itself created, we find that new happiness and growth appears in our lives. Self-love, love from family and friends, and healing love energies from nature can all help to not only mend a gash of love, but to also thrive and blossom into more loving, powerful, and tuned-in individuals. Moral of the story here: love isn’t easy, it can inflict just as much pain as it can intense comfort, but the important thing to keep in mind is that love is everywhere. There is not ever just one sole source of love, so there should never be a lack of healing love to act as a cure for times when you are searching for the antidote to heartache.

3. Love is Ever-Present – Like I said above, love is everywhere and in everything. Sometimes though, our love levels vary, not just for different things, but for one thing in particular. I think this most strongly applies to self-love, where one minute we are feeling good and empowered, and the next we are beating ourselves up over something. It is in these times, when we feel defeated and feel a bit lack luster in our outflow of love for something, be it ourselves or a life passion, that we must keep in mind that just because we don’t feel the same strong intensity of love that we have felt before, doesn’t mean that there is no love left. Sometimes outside factors or unnamable forces drain our current love (along with other emotions!) and we find ourselves in a funk. This does not mean that for instance, if you are an English major you should go rethink your entire life the second you just aren’t feeling motivated to write an essay! Instances of low love and deficient motivation only mean that we need to sow and tend to the flame of love that still burns within us, regardless if it is currently very dim. Moral of the story: as humans, our existence is reliant on the presence of love and we always have it coursing through us even in the times when it feels absent. Essentially, we need to remember to take a few steps back and listen to our souls in an effort to get an accurate census of our fluctuating feelings.

I know I am still a student of this Earth and that I still have a multitude of lessons to learn in my lifetime, but I hope that these small pieces on love have either resonated with you, provided you with some insight, or at least inspired you to continue to spread love. This month, I challenge you to elevate your love and reach out to an old friend or someone you appreciate, give a stranger a compliment, dedicate time to enriching yourself, or partaking in some sort of gratitude/love practice that you do not already consistently do in your everyday routines. Remember that the love you pour out into the world will be returned to you! Here’s to a fresh month dedicated to the driving force of our universe!

How to Love in Every Situation

What I’ve Learned About Love (+ Things Related to It)